Yes, Piles. Farmers, Haemmorhoids, whatever you care to call them. I have them and they are bloody uncomfortable.

I didn’t really get them until post-birth last time, as a result of the abandonment of my hypnobirthing “just breathe him out” ideal, and getting him out in 22 minutes via a LOT of pushing.

Post-birth last time was absolutely miserable for me – because of those bloody piles. Literally – bloody. I was in so much pain – I thought it was mostly from my stitches, but seeming as I’m getting the familiar sort of feeling from this set of piles, I think a lot of the pain I felt could be attributed to those instead. I couldn’t tell what I was feeling before having just had my poor perineum sliced and diced. I didn’t know what was what any more. I just knew I could feel a LOT of pain, whenever I went to the loo – this lasted weeks.

If I took codeine – the only thing to help with the pain – it made the constipation worse. Then I took senna to counteract the constipation (had been doing so in hospital) and I, erm… yeah, well I didn’t make it to the bathroom. I shat myself at the bathroom door. Oh, the glamour. So I just had to put up with paracetamol which didn’t really touch the sides.

I finally got back to some semblance of “normal” in terms of no pain when pooing, no bleeding, and no everyday discomfort at about 6-9 months post-birth. That’s a bloody long time. That’s like… waiting for my birthday NEXT year. It’s a frightening prospect.

In the meantime I am drinking lots, and trying to birth breathe my poo for the rest of this pregnancy.

This whole Crap at Pregnancy thing really has chosen to bite me on the arse, hasn’t it?!


About therubbishpregno

30-something Mum to a toddler. I am pregnant, and I am rubbish at it. My body doesn't seem to be able to cope with daily life as well as pregnancy, so I have had to put my life on hold while I grow another person...
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3 Responses to Piles.

  1. charlotte says:

    aww mate. And you so poised and glamorous in real life. xxx

  2. Oh. My. God.

    This fortunately is one crap element of pregnancy I’ve not yet had… hope it does get better – is there nothing else that can be done?

  3. Birth breathe my poo? PMSL

    Sorry, it’s horrible I know Still funny though ;o)

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